What is a six letter word for cactus? Cactus

Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

What did God say to Adam and Eve? Be fruitful

What did the red fish say to the blue fish? Nothing fish can't talk.

Pickles

Chuck Norris.

Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

Benny: Hi, my name is Benny, what's your name? A potato: ...

What is the first letter of the alphabet? A. a B. 7 C. Mustard gas D. Because a penguin has 2 legs

whats the point of anti jokes? A: the point that it is no point

Santa and smart blond jump off a building who lands frost none nethither exist

What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

How do you make someone laugh? Tell them this joke.

Small Penis.

Yo momma is so fat that....actually she's quite fit and i'd love to take her out on a date.

Why was 7 afraid of 6? It saw what 6 and 9 do when they're together.

Q: 1 out of every 44 presidents can dunk, who is it? A: How the hell am i suppost to know

I have a friend named Dave, he lost his ID and now we call mim Dav

Who in Tyrone's black family gave him presents on christmas? Not his dad.

How did the black man fall of the cliff? He was gazing over and realized he had Prostate cancer and fell off the cliif.

The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

My uncle got hit by a truck, what was the last thing to go through his mind? The drive shaft.

What did I say to the joke? What? Correct.

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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