You've got more chins than a Chinese... Girl with a lot of chins, because she's so fat

Why didn't the disabled kid cross the road? He didn't make it.

Superman and Batman get in a fight, who wins? No one the world has just lost a superhero.

Why did the plane crash? Chuck Norris was sitting in it, and thus his weight was countless times larger than the lift force of the plane.

What is better than life? Nothing.

whats the difrence between santa clause and a jew santa goes down the chimney

Roses are red, Your blood is too, Don't believe me? I WILL CUT YOU

A black guy walks into a bar. He drinks some wine and exits the bar. -Lets Go Mets, not Yankees

Josh, this is your mother. I was wondering if you wanted me to bring my lube and strapon to bed tonight. Wait never mind about the strapon because i have my dick to use.

charly ate an apple. the apple was filled with poison and charly died.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? You're mom. It's your.

what is the difference between a blond and a red head? one is has blond hair and one has red hair

Why did the duck cross road? It didn't, it got ran over.

what did the older brother do? put on a joke on anti jokes what did the younger brother do ? give it a minus score what did the older brother do ? tell him and then played gears of war 2 (they got gears 3 but wanted to go bakc in time, not like michael J fox in a car with a crazy doctor but as in play an old game)

what is the best part about sleeping with twenty six year olds? they are usually very experienced in sexual intercourse so there isn't much awkwardness

Why was the teenage girl pregnant? She got raped by her dad.

What do you get if you cross a bomb expert, and a homophobe a blow job

What did the aliens say when they first landed on planet Earth? We've come back for Anthony Davis.

Wilson: would you buy lottery when you grow up Mattuew: no theres no point Wilson: ask Xiangxi right next to you Mattuew: xiangxi, would you buy lottery if you grow up? Xiangxi: Prabably not, because the chance of winning a lottery is lower than becoming an astronaut Mattuew: the probability of you winning the lottery is higher than you finding a girlfriend

why does clive keep getting crunk? because no girl satisfies him as much as geros

I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

what comes in a can ? Beans Where do beans come from ? Cans

knock knock! who is there? its knock! knock who??? knock knock... who is there.... i told you its knock... knock who??? knock knock... WHO IS THERE!! OMG I TOLD YOU ITS KNOCK! KNOCK WHO!! WHO IS KNOCK! KNOCK KNOCK OMG WTF! HOLY SHIT WHO IS THERE! ITS KNOCK WE HAVE KNOWN EACH OTHER OUR WHOLE LIVES! KNOCK WHO?? KNOCK KNOCK WHY DONT YOU REMEMBER ME! oh knock knock from next door! who is there???? jk.. knock...knock......omg put down the gun knock knock stop i love you knock its not worth it!! NO KNOC!!! GUNSHOT* KNOCK NOOOOO!!! I LOVED YOU SOMEONE CALL 911!! OMG KNOCK WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH KNOCK WHY!!!!

whats flat and useless? the walls of an abandoned house where land prices are increasing and properties are in high demand

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...