How do you make an emo kid cry? He already is.

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? one, hes an electrician

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What's the difference between a hundred dead babies and a porsche? A porsche is a car.

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Your mom is so stupid that her parents were probably ashamed of her low grades.

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An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

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5 Christians, 4 Arabs, 3 Jews, and a Monkey are locked in a room with sticky bombs, hand grenades, a bible, and some bananas. What do they do? play scrabble

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What is white and shaped like a refrigerator? A refrigerator.

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Why did the boy get and iphone? It was his birthday

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A brunette, redhead, and blond were on a road trip. Their car broke down in the middle of the desert. The redhead offered to get help down the road, but never returned. The blond and brunette walked the direction the redhead went, but died four days later of heat exhaustion.

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Nero, seriously, one way or the other, ill kill you, my mom blushes like every time people talk to her so fuck you, my sister if you touch her, ill.... Man, stop and ill forgive you, and I am very very sorry, now stop sending me those pics, and please do not post them anywhere, Line would not want to.

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Why the guy without two hands at the beach was so excited? Because he couldn't scratch his asshole.

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Betty wanted to see time fly so she threw her alarm clock out the window. Shortly after, her mother grounded her as it was quite expensive and she had become less punctual without it.

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Q: There is an Elf King, King Kong, and Godzilla all on the empire state building. Which one jumps first? A: None, because none of them exist.

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why did the little girl fall off the swing she had no arms

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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What happened to my sunglasses?

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what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

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Q: What did blue say to red? A: Let's make some purple

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A white guy, a black guy, and an asian guy are all sitting on a park bench. They share several minutes of uncomfortable silence due to cultural differences.

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What's the difference between a duck?

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Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

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I am green. You are blue. Jokes are infinite. This is too.

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Want to hear an anti joke? Me too thats why Im on this site.

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Whats the difference between the Taliban and a Football Team? I'm not on the football team.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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