What do you call a person who hammers a nail into his forehead? A dumbass.

Pee is yellow Shit is? brown My shit is yellow WTF

Q) What did one chicken say to the other? A) Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

Why did the boy wipeout on his bike? An old man threw a snake in front of his tire

Why doesn't Lucinda have a penis? Because she's Mexican.

Jimmy: Daddy how are babies made? Dad: If i knew how you wouldn't be here...

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the crossing gaurd allowed him to

How do you stop a baby from crying? Douse it in gas and throw it in a fire

what time does the japanese guy go to the dentist? well his appointment was for 11:30, so he might show up approximately 5 minutes prior to the appointment time, just to make sure everything goes steadily as planned

What is not funny Bad jokes!????

Why didn't the boy go to the bathroom? His mother was taking a well deserved bath.

It's caoimhin I wasnt writing cos kane turned my computer off the bel end aodhans been tuping sayin its be the spa.

When Chuck Norris plays Modern Warfare 2, he gets more care packages than Haiti did.

A blonde and a brunette were hanging onto the edge of a cliff for dear life. The brunette somehow found the strength to climb back up. The blonde was impressed, but had muscular dystrophy so she slipped and fell to her death.

Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house? She didn't either.

Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their car with a coat hanger. They had left the keys inside and no-one was around to help.

Why didn't suzzana go to school on Monday?? Because it was Sunday...I lied about it being monday

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Macy's was having a giant sale.

What do Tom Cruise and Santa Claus have in common? They're both Tom Cruise.

Why did Hitler shoot himself? Because he found out Chuck Norris was a Jew.

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest has his papers but the rabbi is sent to a concentration camp.

whats worse than finding out there's mold in your bread? finding out the holocaust is in your bread

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face" and the horse says "my wife just died of skin cancer."

You: "Ask me if im an astronaut. " Them: "R u an astronaut?" You: "No. "

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...