How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

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Why did Billy die? His mother killed him.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. i have Alzheimer's, cheese on toast.

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Q: What is the proper name for a female dog? A: Well there could be several names it could be a name on the collar in which case please look for the number so it can be returned to its owner. Another possibility is that it is a stray which you should either run for it could have a disease and you should just forget about the name then or take it in as your own and name it.

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How many Babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them

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what is black and white and read all over? a bankrupt newspaper that cannot afford color ink because the accountant misplaced company funds.

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Why was the elf sad Because a polar bear ate his family

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If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

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What did the caninibol do when he duped his girlfriend He wiped

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Why did little Jimmy fall off his bike? Because I threw a fridge at him.

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven has an extra penis

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What is the worse joke to tell a Orpahn Knock Knock Whos there not your parents

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Why did the man walk into the wall? He was blind.

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Double-whammy

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Why did suzy not eat her breakfast? because i stapled her to the table.

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Knock Knock Who's there? My foot. My foot who? My foot in your ass.

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What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

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What did the single woman get for Christmas? Raped.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

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Why did the man answer his cell phone at 3 AM in the morning? Because his phone was ringing and was probably waiting for an important phone call

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A muslim walks out of a plane.

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What do you call literature that's depressing and hard to read? ...a valued part of the English curriculum

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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