A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

Wanna hear something irrational? Pi

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? The lawyer is a human being whose profession is to give legal advice and assistance to clients and represent them in court or in other legal matters while the catfish is a freshwater or marine fish with whiskerlike barbels around the mouth, typically bottom-dwelling. -BG_Shank_A

Where did the paralytic go for a vacation? No where he can't move.

What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Lunch.

Why didnt the chicken cross the road? Because he got hit by a bus.

A man walks into a bar. He orders a Guinness.

I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. But it wasn't actually getting bigger, it was just getting closer. So I got hit in the face.

What did the Pedophile say to the small girl? I have served my sentence and been successfully rehabilitated. Please continue playing out in public without fear of being sexually assaulted.

A doctor tells a guy: "I have bad news. You have Alzheimer's, and you have cancer." Guy says, "Thank God I don't have cancer."

What happens when you lay a diamond in the water for two hours? It gets wet.

Where would canada be without nature? still here

What's the best example of an anti-joke? This one.

What did the man get on his birthday the week before he died? Obamacare

Some people are like Slinkies: they don't work as well as they say they will and you'll get bored of them quickly.

Why is travis so funny? Trick question, He died of cancer 3 years ago.

What has two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

a lady says, " i cant stand this." Th guy next to her had his legs blown off and will never be able to stand again.

How does micheal Jackson know when it's bed time? When the big hand touches the little hand.

Whats worse than a dead baby? Two dead babys.

Why did John get hard? He froze to death

" Want to hear a good anti-joke?! " " Sure! " " Me too. "

I'm trying to find out how many people in the world have Alzheimers, do you? No. Bananas.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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