Why does Snoop Dog carry an umbrella? For rain.

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Little Johnny walked into class one day. The teacher announced their would be a pop-quiz on the declaration of independence. Johnny passed. (ic3)

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Yo momma, she so fat, she needs to buy extra-large clothes.

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Chuck Norris has normal human strength.

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So, a Bobcat walks into a bar. A few moments later, the bar was empty, save a bobcat and two critically wounded men.

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whats not funny and has access to a computer and reasonable internet? Me

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Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

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Whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? 15 minutes in the oven.

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Q: whats the difference between a t.v and a dead baby? A: i don't have a t.v in my garage

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Why did the man walk into the bar Because he was an acoholic

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What do you call a black man who is flying a plane? A pilot.

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Yo' Mama is so fat, her driver's license says, "picture continued on other side."

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How many babies does it take to paint a barn? It depends on how hard you throw them

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What do you do if your walking into a room full of Lions and Jaguars? You stop walking.

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Why did the middle-aged lady have a heart attack? Years of heavy smoking, alcohol abuse and lack of exercise had taken its toll on her body, causing it to age prematurely. @JWest

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woman's lacrosse

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how do you kill chuck norris? you dont, killing is illegal

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A black guy, a white guy, and a Canadian walk into a bar what do they all have in common. They are all involved in my Joke.

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My diick won't stop barking unless I take it for a walk, problem is, I can't find a leash big enough

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How many people can you fit in an oven? Six million, according to Hitler.

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Q: Why did the guy fall off his bike? A: He got shot!

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Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Doctor Adams. You called me about your father's stroke.

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What is annoying and uses another language? Spanish class!

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A guy walks into a bar carrying an octopus under his arm. The bartender asks him, "say, buddy, what's with the octopus?" and the man replies, "this is the most intelligent octopus in the world. In fact, I bet you $100 that it can play any instrument you give it." The bartender snickers at the other patrons, and puts $100 on the bar. He motions the man over to the piano by the wall. The man puts the octopus on the piano, but nothing happens. The octopus is dead, because it's been out of the water for a while. The bartender looks at the man sadly, as two psychiatric orderlies from the local mental hospital take the visitor away to the looney bin, after another patron called the police. The bartender never gets his $100, and now he has to clean up the godawful mess on his piano.?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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