What did the text-to-speech reader say when the 12 year old boy played around with it? "Ass ass ass ass, ass ass ass ass."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are polemicists.

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why did the chicken cross the road? well... to get to the other side.

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Did I say twenty times? I meant two hundred, you already know this I gather, but your subconcious understands mathmatics and multiplications at a whole different level because its potential is indefinite.

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how many baby's does it take to paint a wall?? depends how hard u throw them

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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It's probably not a good idea that your in here, any sudden movements and you could seriously injure somebody. Our beer glasses aren't ergonomically designed for your kind of species. I'm going to have to ask you to leave

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You trying to be funny kid? This is a matter of security to the national degree, point zero has been compromised, unless you bring out one of these soon, I am myself going to drag your ass into prison.

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My name's Forrest Gump. People call me Forrest Gump.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream. Because he got hit by a bus

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Yo mama's so stupid, she put the baby in the microwave

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

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Who does creatine? James Cornish

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An American, a Mexican and a Cuban are in a car. For they are heading to the store to buy groceries and then come home to make dinner.

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whats long and hard and full of seamen a penis

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What do you get if you cross a goat with a horse? Long letters of complaints by animal rights groups

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Caroline Kelly...Tight Butthole

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why did the black man drink grape kool-aid kool-aid refreshed him after a hard days work out in the field picking cotton

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Whats worse than a creep? ..... Paul sweeney!

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Q:what's faster than a black man with you t.v A:his brother with your laptop

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Why did the car go down the road? Someone was driving it. Why did the car stop? Because he suddenly fell and had a stroke.

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What is the difference between a calendar and you? A calendar has dates!!

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Roses are Red Violets or Red Trees are Red HOLY SH*T MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops