Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

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What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

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A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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What's a worse place to be besides the friendzone? On your grandmas lap crying because your parents just died in a car crash.

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why did tiarnan not ride hi bike to school today? Tiarnans dead

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You're so fake, Barbara Millicent Roberts is jealous of you.

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Whats the same between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple except for the elephant

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A black man walks into a KFC, he then realizes that he is in the wrong store, and walks out.

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"knock knock" "who's there" "Chuck" "Get out of here Chuck I hate you!"

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A blonde, a brunette and a red head are having a discussion on current issues. The brunette says she would like to see improvements in the environment. The red head says she would like to see the economy prosper. The blonde says she has to take a poop.

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As we had been trying for some months now, I called my wife to ask her the result of her pregnancy test. A stranger answered and promptly told me she was killed in a car crash.

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how do you make Will Smith cry? cut off his toes and fingers.

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dont you hate it when your reading something and it doesnt end the way you cactus

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Who looks like Bill Cosby, Smells like Bill Cosby, But isn't Bill Cosby? An imposter who should be sent to jail.

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Yo mama so fat she makes blind kids cry

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Why did the deer cross the road? To cause the car crash that killed my father when i was just 15 years old.

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? nothing he was Jewish

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getting up in the morning is the 3nd hardest thing :DDD

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Why was the lemon wearing a blue shirt? Because its red shirt was dirty.

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If all ziggles are zaggles and all zaggles are zumbles, then why is your mother a whore?

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How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None they would just beat the room for being black.

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9/11 jokes are just plane wrong

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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