Why couldn't Jimmy run in the track race? Because he has been paralyzed since he was 3, due to a horrible accident

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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What do you call a white man? A caucasian male.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had completed its task on the aforementioned other side and was returning back to the coop for a feeding now that the sun had set.

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A man walks into a house, and the next day was taken to the hospital for a minor concussion and a possible vision deficiency.

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Why are the asians on cabin services? Because they do not speak english well enough to converse with guests.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? Because her grandfather hit her with a wrench.

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Spongebob. "Hey Patrick, I thought of something funnier than 24." Patrick "Let me hear it." Spongebob "25"

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Roses are red My name is Dave This poem makes no sense And it doesn't rhyme either

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What do you call the man with no arms or legs, swimming in the bay? Bob.

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What does a banana and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them are a police officer.

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Knock-Knock Come in! ...

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-What did the old lady have for dinner? -Dementia

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Yo mama's so ugly, She cured cancer.

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Why was Jimmy sad he couldn't play the Playstation? He didnt have one

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fridge

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? What do you mean what's the difference?!?! One of them is a fucking elephant!

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What's black and white and red all over and can't go through a revolving door? A nun with a spear stuck in her head.

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Brother : you see this hand Sister : yes Brother : if you dont leave ill slap you with it Sister : no you wont !SLAP!!!!

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Your girlfriend.

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Did you hear about the Polish couple taking selfies while on vacation in Portugal? They fell off a cliff and died in front of their children. True story.

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A:You wanna here a good anti joke B:Yeah/sure A:Me too

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What's worse than requesting a three-some to your in-laws? Forgetting to suggest that they me too fragile and disabled, resulting in one of their limbs breaking.

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8

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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