MILLERS FUNNY LIKE A JEW

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when chuck norris does a pushup, he is tearing the muscles in his biceps, deltoids, core, and triceps in order to make them stronger.

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George Bush=Bush Dick Cheny=Dick Colin Powell=Colon Condoleezza Rice=Rice One of these doesn't belong here.

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The asian boy only did an hour of study....... nothing was heard of him after his mum found out

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why did the teacher quit her job and become a musician? Because her class was very mean to her and growing up she had always wanted to play music

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what's an advantage of breaking every bone in your body? nothing, you're screwed.

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Urban ghettos

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Two guys walk into a bar.... OUCH

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Mexicans don't use lightbulbs because they can't afford them.

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What do you call a white guy in a mostly black neighborhood? His name.

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Q:Whats worse than stubbing your toe? A: Watching a terrorist saw your dads arm off.

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how do you make a cat get out of a tree you shot it

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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A blonde walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What're you drinking?" The blonde says, "Nothing yet. That's why I'm in a bar. But your lack of basic observation skills is disturbing."

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A Man Gets Cancer He eventually Loses all his hair and drops dead

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Roses are red Violets are blue Not all poems rhyme Penis

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 17

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#Last Christmas I gave you my heart #And as far as I know #The transplant was a complete sucess #And you have recovered from your operation #And are now well again #This year to save me from tears #I'll donate my kidneys

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Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

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What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck!

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Once upon of time, there was an ugly duckling. It was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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There are 3 Chinese guys migrating to the USA, Chu, Bu and Fu. . Chu added a 'ck' to? his name and became Chuck Bu did the same thing and became Buck. Fu got sent back to china

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Who has two thumbs and is happy? This girl! You're a girl?

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Whats the difference between a soccer ball and a baby? Babies cry when I kick them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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