What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Tiger woods is a famous golf player and Santa is a fictional old man dressed in red and white who is said to live in Lapland, have an airborne sleigh driven by eight magical reindeer and come down the chimney to fill childrens' stockings on Christmas eve.

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Why couldn't the kid eat his vegetables? His parents stabbed him...

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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whats worse then getting a bad present on your birthday? dying.

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To mama's so fat that her escape velocity in her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting stabbed.

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree?Cause it was stapled to the cat.

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really? are people insistantly so totally stupid? Now read that again and you may notice something. :P

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Why does the Easter Bunny hide his eggs? So nobody finds he's been fucking hens.

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scraggle is in you pillow case

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Whats worse than getting hit in the face with an axe? Getting hit in the face with two axes.

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A:You wanna here a good anti joke B:Yeah/sure A:Me too

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Knock knock who's there? Gary Glitter ?_?

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Two penguins are in the shower. One of them asks if he can have the soap. The other responds, "What am I, a telephone?"

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roses are red grass is greener get in the bed and suck on my wiener

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What did the bird say to the other bird? Nothing because birds can't talk.

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What do black people and bananas have in common? 50% of their DNA

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you dint have to be a jew matt

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What's green, has six legs and lives in the jungle? A Snooker Table.

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what's black and hangs from a tree in my garden? a blackberry

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What did the korean say to the other korean. I don't know i dont speak korean.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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What do you call a group with one Jew and three Germans? Friends

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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