Roses are Red Violets are blue Shut up I'm watching Re-runs of FRIENDS.

whats pink, brown, and smells like a banana. monkey vomit?

How do you starve a Mexican? You stick him in a secure room and deprive him of food resources

How do you blind an Asian man You stab him six times in each eye socket and drop cyan pepper in his eye wound.

What's worse than a worm in your apple That one time I rapped and killed your mom, oh and happy birthday prick

Why couldn't Sally celebrate hollaween? Because she's not allowed to take candy from strangers. Also Sally died a week ago in a car crash.

Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

Whats black and white and red all over?? Half a zebra

What do you get when you mix a teenager with a tanning bed? Cancer

Why does a new mother have big jugs? Her baby died of Sudden infant death syndrome.

Why didn't the dog come to his master when it was called? It didn't have any legs.

What are the similarites between Autistic people and dead people? They are both very poor in social situations

Why did the potato cross the road? It didn't. A potato is a vegetable. It cannot walk, think or speak.

What do you get when you cross the ocean with a dinosaur? Wet.

what did one lady say to another lady we are both ladies

Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

What's worse than hitting your funny bone? Nothing

whats worse than 10 babies nailed to a tree? one baby nailed to ten trees.

Q:How do you sleep with Paris Hilton? A:You don't. she got herpes.

How did the Cuban get into Florida? Well he got his passport and other papers, flew in, then went to Customs.

Whats worse than 10 babies nailed to one tree 1 baby nailed to 10

What does a banana and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them are a police officer.

what is like a duck and quacks ? A duck.

why'd the chicken cross the road It didn't, it was safely placed inside a chook house

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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