Have you heard that Bert & Ernie from Sesame Street are gay? If so, than whoever told you may be mentally challenged, Bert & Ernie are both puppets which even though they resemble people with active personalities, they remain puppets and do not have a sexual oreintation.

Why did the chicken cross the road? ... So he didn't get Mono from Janelle.

a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and bacomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into shit.

"Is this the Krusty Krab ?" I'M TIRED OF YOUR SHIT TYRONE.

what do you call a pie in a roll a roll and pie

Why did the chicken cross the mobia strip? To get to the same side!

Roses are red, violets are blue, take this medication, and call me if you have any symptoms of nausea or heartburn.

Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

Q.what is the diffrence between a jew and a pizza A.pizzas dont scream in the oven

Q: Did you know Hellen Kellers father was a skilled craftsman? A: Neiter did she.

Whats black and white and red all over? Genital Warts...

Why did they name the team mavericks and why Was the maskot a horse? Because 50 years ago they found a blue horse And its name was maverick

what is the difference between gravel and dead baby guts? i dont eat gravel.

What do you get when you cross a Chinese man with a dog? A happy Chinese man and a pile of dog bones.

Why did the overweight black man wake up & then not get out of bed? He was paraplegic.

Why did a jew die? It got killed by a nazi.

A: Can I get a tall white Russian. B: No. A: Why not? B: Because this is a Barnes and Nobles. However, we do have a Starbucks, and I can offer you a venti caramel iced coffee"

Q: Do you know what you can make when you have enough cents? A: Dollars

Why did the airplane crash? A loaf of bread was the pilot.

Your momma is so fat, she has her own gravitational pull.

A: go away. B: No i won't A: Shutup B: Yes i will not go away A: again, shutup B: I left A: Thank you B: Your welcom A: Thank you for saying your welcome B: Thank you for saying thank you that i'm welcome A: Thank you for saying thank you for saying that I thank you that you're welcome.

What did the Asian say after he had a nightmare? Nothing his nightmare was actually reality and a dishwasher fell on him and killed him.

What's the difference between a portuguese widow and a llama? One is a portuguese widow and the other isn't.

NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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