haha

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

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What do you call an arab with a beard? How cares what his name is just shoot him!

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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Q: Why are pine trees green? A: Because of the green pigments in the leaves known as chlorophyll which are used to capture sunlight.

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A lawyer walks into a bar, and due to the repercussions of severe head trauma was never able to do so again.

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What's worse than getting murdered? Getting murdered twice? - Louis

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your mother is so fat, she possesses her own orbit

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Why did the parents tell their adopted son to go to bed? He was awake long after he should've been, according to the rules in their household.

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hi

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What's the difference between meat and fish? You can't beat your fish.

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Two women are sitting on a park bench, minding their own business, saying nothing.

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I want some pudding. but I didn't have my meat. how can I have pudding?

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him and got better.

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Why couldn't the emo kid finish reading his book? Because he was on the titanic when it sank.

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Why was the road crossed by the chicken? Because as an animal, incapable of understanding human languages and consequently lacking in education, it was unable to understand the convention of not using the passive voice in English prose writing.

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you can either take the test now or on monday. (hand movement)

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Why did the man walk into the grocery store? Because he had run out of peanut butter

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how do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The fridge is on its side, the door is torn off, and the ruined food scattered all over the floor. Not to mention there is an elephant in your kitchen.

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Sarah Palin's political campaign

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Cheese

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Why can't the man get a good jod? Because he did not go to college and there for did not get a good education.

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A cat walks into a bar, the bartender says "pussy?"

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Whats the diffetance between a river and a waterfall? One is vertical!??

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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