Why does Ray Charles always smile? Because he doesn't know he's black.

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“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”

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Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Doctor Adams. You called me about your father's stroke.

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You are right, the past still has its claws deep within me thank you friend.

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Fat? Jesse Z

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Whats the difference between a bench and a black man? A bench is an inanimate object incapable of speech, emotion, or thought process.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.It got ran over by a bus.

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Why was the cat meowing really loud? It was on fire. Why did the cat suddenly stop meowing? It died.

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What's greenish blue, smelly, and mushy? The fungus under my sink.

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Why do birds fly South in the winter? Warmer, better food sources and therefore greater chance of survival.

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What do you call a bathtub full of dead babies? A tragedy.

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What did the little boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas?? Nobody knows because he had no arms, therefore he could not open any presents.

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why couldn't the girl sit down? she didn't have a butt.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? no. He didn't either.

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Equal rights!

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A blonde asks, "How come i cant get this to go in there?" However no one replies because no one is there.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse then says nothing because horses cannot talk, only humans can talk.

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So a man and his wife were in a horrible car accident. The man died, so why isn't the wife mourning his death? Because she is also dead. But, do you know who did mourn and cry over this horrible tragedy? Their children, other family members, and friends.

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What did the black do when a man robbed his house? He called 911

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Why couldn't the black man support his family? He was the youngest child of 3 and already had a caring and supporting mother and father.

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Have you seen stevie wonders new house No Niether has he

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Neither does the chicken. (you're supposed to laugh...)

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What does a sock, pillow and a lamp have in common? -they all live underwater expect for the sock, pillow and lamp -Matt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops