Q: What is every blonde's ambition? A: To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.

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We got him in about five minutes, the kid will already be exhausted by the point we get to him, r rather, he gets to us. Pretty quick for a small geek I got to say, the photography we got of him is an obvious Photoshop, but he seems similar enough I guess. I would call, but it seems someone has been messing with all other "Erron`s" homes and phones if I had not dropped mine, I would not have noticed we have been bugged for a while, pretty professional gear too,

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? Getting tortured to death. Whats worse than being tortured to death? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, and getting tortured to death. Whats worse than that? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, getting tortured to death, and finding a worm in your apple.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He is promptly arrested for sexual harassment.

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Obama One Big Ass Mistake America

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Whats funnier than Steven Yuhasz being Straight? Womens Rights.

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How many gays does it take to change a lightbulb? It's COMPLETELY circumstantial.

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Why are all black people fast? They aren't its a stereotype.

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Two women are sitting on a park bench, minding their own business, saying nothing.

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Wanna here a funny joke... Trevor michael dyess's social life.

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Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

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if you press the thumbs up button nyan cat is going to visit you tonight

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Someone threw a hippo at the pilot.

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Whats funny about a blonde, brunette and red-head stranded on an island? Nothing. They are in a very dangerous survival situation, which could prove to be fatal

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How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? Well none today because today is Saturday... maybe tomorrow

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Why did she fall again? Because somebody put her back on. Why wasn't she able to hug her dad? Because she has no dad.

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What's long and hard and full of semen? An erect penis at the climax of an orgasm.

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A man once had a monkey, and it made him very happy. then one day, his monkey ran away. So the man was very sad and screamed, "I knew i should have broken the monkey's legs!!"

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If the 49ers won the superbowl

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What is Abraham Lincoln's favorite website? Wikipedia. It's very informative. On second thought though, the Internet had not been invented yet back in his time.

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What makes my fourth grade librarian hot? The fact that I set her on fire

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My little league baseball coach measured the team for cups. Its 9 years later and we still dont have those cups.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was at a crosswalk and had the right of way to on coming traffic

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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