Chuck Norris walks up to a baby and punches it in the face He walks away and laughs

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Son: "Mommy That Boy Over There Beat Me Up" Mom: Good I Like When You Suffer

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What's Green and has Wheels? Ian Leighton... I LIED ABOUT THE GREEN

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A bar walks into a man... The man begins screaming uncontrollably as the corner of the building is inserted into his anus. Brick by brick, the bar forces its way inside the man's ass, as blood begins dripping down his legs. The man knows damn well it is impossible for such a large building to be contained inside him, but he grits his teeth and forces his ass open wider. His ribs break, his lungs collapse, and his now lifeless body is stretched into the shape of the bar. The bar is almost entirely consumed before the man's skin gives way to the bulging pressure...with an explosion of blood & organs, the shredded remains of the man are slung-shot around the lot where the bar formerly stood. The bar, now soaked in a mixture of blood & organ fluid, reflects upon the failure of its experiment. For the next attempt, a man of far greater fortitude must be used, so that his body does not burst so easily. Only then will it achieve its dream of becoming the first bar to walk into a man.

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I used to have an ugly,black and disabled man as a friend. However, he had a very nasty personality so we are no longer friends.

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Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree no

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It's that time of the month again... ...to cut my toenails.

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Do you know how I know you're gay? 'Cuz your dick taste like shit.

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Why were two black men fighting for a dollar that fell on the floor? Because they both lost their homes in the crashing market and have to care for their ill children that need money for medical expenses.

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How do you get children to behave? Chop them up.

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Why was the black man running? He has to stay fit for the army.

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Why did Jim get hit by a train? Because he was standing in the tracks.

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A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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Roses are red violets are blue this poem is stupid.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She got shot in the head by her drunk step-dad.

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What do a watermelon and a bunny have in common? they are both green except the bunny

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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The black man at the narcotics anonymous meeting said, "oh, this isn't bingo is it?" then walked out of the room feeling mildly embarassed.

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What's worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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how do you rube out a circle? don't draw one

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How many Jews can you fit in the car? 4 in the seats and 6 million in the ashtray.

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the awkward moment when your mom wakes you up and you realize she died six years ago

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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