I used to be an adventurer like you, until old age slowly took away my ability to move and go adventuring

How do you make a blonde go 'ewwwww'? Hand her a moose placenta.

What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

Listen Nero, you are the only one I suspect right now, how do you know all of this? Why should I believe you?!

What did hitler say to the jacket potato? Your fucked now!

Q: Why did the white mother with a newborn baby lock her car doors? A: Because a black guy walked by.

why did the girl cross the road? no one knows because she was hit with a car and died on impact.

Der Ter-Rerks, nern ter serrentersts ers "Terernerserers Rerks", wers er dernerser dert lerved ern der Certersers perrerd. Ert wers er mert erter, prering ern smerler, plernt-erterng dernersers serch ers herdrersers ernd serrerperds. Ert erser hernterd der herned herberver Tersererterps, werd erverderns erf ferts ferned ern der ferserlersed rermerns.

Whats worst than the holocaust? What? 6million Jews.

Voldemort's nose is so flat, that it looks like he doesn't have a nose.

Humpty the extreme sized grenade fell off the wall. The universe is now in little pathetic bits.

Your mom is so stupid... She was unable to go to college and therefore was not able to find a good job.

what do you call a guy with no arm and legs laying by the door? Matt! what do you call a guy with no arms and legs floating on water Bob!

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A catfish could never pass the LSAT because it is unable to perform high-level critical thinking.

1)Roses are red... 2)5 black men... 3)dead babies walk into a large crowded bar before dissolving into oblivion at the literary incongruency 4)of the whole situation.... 5)yes chicken got to the other side BEFORE me #)stupid chicken (aka duck rose man help....)

Q: What's worse than a paper cut? A: 9/11

Knock Knock who's there? ... who's there?!?!?! ... WHO'S THERE ?!?!?!? ... stupid kids.

What is blue and roles about on the floor A baby playing with a plastic sack

How do you make a person dissapear? You can't that would break the laws of physics, so therefore rendered impossibe.

Harry thrust his wand forward, "Expelliarmus!" Voldemort casually ducks, and fires a killing curse at our hero.

How do you catch a Jew? Just give him a little shower ;)

How do you know when a blonde has been using your computer? If you're lucky some of his or hair will have fallen out and be left on the keyboard as evidence.

What's green, has 4 legs and can kill you if lands on your head? a pool table.

Where does Mario go after you finish the game? Drug rehab.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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