Your mother is so fat, she is at great risk for developing diabetes mellitus type 2.

why did the guy throw his clock out the window? because he wanted to see a clock fall out the window

What's the deal with airline food? Food tastes different on an airplane. The atmosphere dries out your nose, the air pressure numbs 1/3 of your taste buds, and low humidity levels give you cotton mouth. These factors cause the food to taste worse than it normally would.

Knock knock, ... Little Timmy bursts into tears, Because his parents don't love him.

What do you call an overly-sexual, chewbacca-like creature that smokes cocaine and shoots heroin, while beating its offspring? Mom.

Roses are red violets are blue What the heck do flowers Have to do with You?

Q. What is ginger and ginger? A. a ginger

Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

A man is standing on the street corner waiting for the bus. As it pulls up he steps on and pays his fare while he whistles to his iPod.

what are the best kind of bees none they sting and hurt like hell

Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: Someone who just got stabbed to death reading the newspaper.

What's blue and wiggles? A baby in a bag

What walks on the three legs? Martin, he was born with a tragic birth defect and struggles to make a living.

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

What happened when a star exploded? It killed billions of other sentient beings.

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A hero is nice to everyone, but one person. who is that? Your mom. WOOOOOOOT!! YOU JUST GOT MUSCLEMANED!!!!

What did the homeless man get for his birthday? AIDS

Why did the horse die? I shot it in the face.

Rose are red Violets are blue all I what to know is what do that mouth do

Whats big and red and eats rocks? A big red rockeater.

My dog has no nose, how does it smell? Using its anus.

What is Cleopatra's favorite cookie? A: Chips Ahoy

like if your cool

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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