- Anti Joke

A black guy and a Puerto Rican are in a car. Who's driving? Most likely one of the two, because if they were not that would be illegal.

What do you call a Welshman with a stick up his arse? A very odd man

What's brown and sticky? A black man covered in syrup.

Why did the girl throw away her hairspray? Because she realized the harmful contaminants emitted from the nozzle were expediting the deterioration of the ozone layer thus contributing to global warming.

A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

Q:What did the duck say to the other duck A:We are both ducks

A working black man, Santa, and the Easter Bunny where walking down the street and find a penny, who picks it up? The working black man, Santa and the Easter Bunny take no payment for their work.

Why is Joel always with Jamie? Because her incorrectly positioned eyes prevent her from seeing the true Joel.

Cameron is a r e t a r d

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple-sized tumor in your colon.

How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Eight, because there's one tickle per tentacle!

What's the difference between and indian man and a barstool....... indians walked on the moon with a cow named chester.

A man walks into a bar and says, "I'll take a drink."

Whats black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I felt like kicking something.

What did the newborn get on it's birthday? A life

An African-American is working on math problems and notices an Asian man walking by. The African American asked,"Could you help me out on these math problems?" The Asian man replied, " I have never been good at math."

Knock Knock. There was no answer.

Knock Knock Who's there

What do you do i a stranger offers you candy? Make sure its not stale then jump in his van.

This night was a particularly stormy one, many a crop destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could emotionally blind those who may experience it's full potential. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a secluded village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for there lives, all but Jonny, that is. Jonny was bullied from a young age, approximately 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope, expectation and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going to venture into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there that Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down in the family's precious leather chair, looked her in the eye and whispered a sweet farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible, so now he is armed with the fact that his father is there for him, to help him further his adventure. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He grabbed his stash of Cool Original Doritos, took with him a couple cartons of Apple and Blackcurrant Ribena, got his Grandfather's lucky medallion and his inhaler and took his first step outside. He whipped out a carton of Ribena, used the straw to puncture a hole through which to drink, strongly crumpled up the carton, slightly spraying pure fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the drooping wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and with a cry so intense, shouted, "Nothing will stop me!!". Jonny died shortly after of HIV induced AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 3 to 5 years, depending on behavior, in a high security prison for child molestation, frequent and consistant child abuse and paedophillia and smuggling Crystal Meth. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

OK, so there's this blonde driving down the road in her brand new, candy-apple red, $125,000 Lamborghini. She's cruising at about 95, radio blaring, having a great time. She comes up on this trucker who is carrying a double-wide home and is taking up both lanes. To her disliking, he is only going about 45. To get the point across that she wants to get past, she decides to tailgate him. So, she gets to within a foot of his rear bumper. The trucker looks back and sees her on his ass, and motions for her to get off of it, but to her it looks like a wave and she waves back. Since her first attempt was futile, she decided to get a little closer and begin flashing her headlights, hopefully making herself more visible in the process. Once again the trucker sees her on his ass, and this time motions for her to pull over to the side of the road. The trucker steps out of his vehicle with a chunk of chalk and draws a circle three feet in diameter in the middle of the road. He instructs her not to move until he tells her to. Naive as she was, she agrees to it and steps inside it. The trucker goes back to his truck and pulls out a 50-ounce Louisville Slugger. He walks over to the Lamborghini and beats it, and beats it, and beats it again. When he is done, all that is left is a brand new, candy-apple red, $125,000 pile of metal. Satisfied, he throws the bat in his truck and walks over to the blonde. When he gets there, to his astonishment, the cops were waiting. He was found guilty in court and forced to pay the blonde a settlement of $250, 000.

What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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