How did the Mexican cross the border? He couldn't he didn't have legs

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What do you call a black man in green shoes and a yellow hat ? Nothing,thats just him pursuing in his own regular casual outfit there for you would just notice him as a normal man walking around with shoes and a hat on so there is nothing to call him

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A construction worker walks into a bar. Lucky he was wearing his hard hat.

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Grease is the word that you heard it's got groove it's got meaning

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer was sexually abusive.

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What's white and sticky.... Jizz

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What do you call 100 dead babies in my garage? Murder.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an orange and finding a worm.

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Two cows are out in a field grazing. One falls over and dies because it was unhealthy and was ravaged with a deadly disease. The other cow, which does not understand death, continues to graze until the farmer moves it back to the barn.

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Wha....You probably shouldnt read the rest of this because i lie a lot (This joke deserves lots of thumbs and comments!)

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Why did the teacher give the little boy a golden star? He was a Jew and it was in Germany during the 1940's

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Why couldn't the pirate enter into the movie? Because he's dead.

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One muffin says to the other muffin "it sure is hot in here." the other muffin replies "you know, technically, we're not muffins because we're not done cooking yet."

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Yeah, haha, I tend to put myself under a state of trance at the same time I put others down there, which makes it difficult to stop it sometimes, I do it for ethical reasons, I mean if I would ever hypnotize someone into feeling really bad, it would affect me as well. You might want to get some water on your face, you know, so your upper lips don't envy the lower ones.

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They all gone.

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.Ttwo guys walked into a bar. The third one ducked.

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What is green and red and is going super fast? A frog in a blender.

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Why don't black people ever defend themselves on anti jokes? Because black people are slaves.

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A blonde and a brunette jump off a building, who hits the ground first? The one that jumped first

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What did the cool guy say to Kelly Clarkson? Nothing, she's fat.

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Women's Rights

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A jew goes into a church. Yolo.

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom? Magic.

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why did the boy drop his ice cream? a terrorist dropped a bomb on him which turned into a transformer, raped him and then burried him inside of his refridgerator

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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