Why is the baby not crying? Because it died of herpes. JUST KIDDING! Babies can't get herpes.

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What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

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An Asian man walks into a bar and ask the Barman for a beer, the Barman is racist and therefore tells the Asian man to leave his pub. The man goes home and drowns his children in the bath and pushes his wife down the stairs, he is found out by the police and is given a life sentence in jail. 5 years later the Barman kills someone in a bar fight and is also sent to jail for life. The Barman meats the Asian man in prison and they settle there differences with a handshake. Two days later the Barman was stabbed in the neck.

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Roses are smiling, violets are trying to kill me. DId I mention I'm a paranoid schizophrenic?

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What was the last thing that went through the crashing helicopter pilot's head? The propeller.

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what did the guy say to the goose? i know you don't understand but my life sucks. my wife just dumped me for another man and my kids hate me. thank you. you are the only one to understand.

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A women was driving along in her brand new, swanky, red ferrari when she spotted a red light in the distance. She stopped steadily, following the rules of the road. All of a sudden a loud bang came from behind her where a young driver had hit her at 50 mph. They both come to an abrupt stop and exited their vehicles. The women says "Idiot, you just hit me!" The boys says "oh don't worry, I have insurance."

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What do you get when you cross a road with a car? Severe injuries or even death.

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what did the obese kid get for chistmas? an athsma attack ,which led to death.

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How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the engine wasnt working.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Postman Will you sign hear please he said Oh my toaster came

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Jacob Edwards has friends.

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why did the baby cross the road? he was stapled to the chicken

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What do you call a black pilot? A PILOT

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Why did the overweight black man wake up & then not get out of bed? He was paraplegic.

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Why were black people mad about slavery? Because they didn't get paid in gum! Holt9 ;P

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Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

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What's the difference between a bucket of shit and a black guy? -the bucket.

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What did Buzz say to Woody? A lot. There were 3 movies.

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Whats red and has wheels? An apple, I was just kidding about the wheels.

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friend' Knock Knock! you; no one home go away

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Whats the difference between a man and a cat. There both different species.

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Roses are red They can be white too Violets are not blue They are violet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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