One, two, three, four and five

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What's worse than seeing Charlie sheen in a Turkish bath house? Watching the direct tv commercial for the 100th time today

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How do you make a baby fit in a bottle? Blender.

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Whats the difference between a monkey and another monkey? I dont know google it!

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Yo mama's chest is so flat that it's because she has stage five breast cancer and had to get both her breasts removed.

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your moms so fat that she had to buy bigger cloths, her husband left her, she became a druggie and died alone.

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how many black guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?................ we dont know because u cant c them

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Why did God create Ebola? Because he hates us all.

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Why did sarah fall of the swing? she has no arms. Knock knock. whos there? not sarah.

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What's red and sweet and good to eat? A riddle that rhymes.

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Q:what do you call a black man with blonde hair flying a plane? A: A pilot

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How many dogs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. Dogs don't have thumbs.

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What did the sea say to the penguin? Nothing it just waved..

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Why did the man eat the apple? He had just witnessed a cow butchering and decided to become a vegitarian the moment he got home. He now lives in 1st degree depression because of what he saw 2 hours ago.

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A blonde heard that 90% of all crimes occur within a one-mile radius of the home, so she had a security alarm installed.

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I wonder what mute people say to themselves. :/

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Q: how do you test the sharpness of a knife A: stab someone MR

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If you know someone with the last name Schmidt. ALWAYS ask him to take a Schmidt on your chest

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What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot n' spicy and the other analyzes urine. -Emo Phillips

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What's blue and smells like red paint Blue paint.

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Well, I guess it's back to the drawing board.

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Roses are red Violets are T I T S I like T I T S T I T S

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What did the snowman say when winter was ending? -Nothing you dumbass

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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