You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

what do a blonde and a brunette have in common? They were both red-heads until they walked into great clips.

all these jokes are horrible now

YOU-why did the airplane crash? (person): why? YOU-Because jimmy was flying it. (person): Who is jimmy? YOU- a fish.

What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

What do you call a boomerang that doesnt come back? A stick.

It's not ok to have intercourse with a woman who say's "No!" But what about "Let go of me!"?

What's the difference between a black person and cancer? If you don't know already, you should really question your countries education system and your parents upbringing.

Women. Can't live with them. Can't systemically murder them without compromising the reproductive integrity of the species.

whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idear.

If 2 wrongs make a right and 2 rights make a wrong, then when you have 4 rights=2 wrongs, you have a true statement. If you have 8 rights = 4 wrongs, you have a verified statement.

What did the duck say to the Pope? Quack.

Do you know what one golf ball said to the other? Nothing they are lifeless objects

Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

Whats a lion in Antartica? . Dead

What's worse then 10 dead babies in 1 tree? 1 dead baby in 10 trees...

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

You know how they say cats have nine lives? They don't.

Q:John has 50 candy bars and he eats 45, what does john have? A: Diabetes

"knock knock" "who's there" "Chuck" "Get out of here Chuck I hate you!"

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing.

How do you make an Indian explode? Push the red button

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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