what's a snake that has no legs a snake

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A Higgs Boson walks into a church, and the priest says, "We don't allow Higgs Boson's in here," and the Higgs Boson says, "But I thought Christianity promised acceptance to everyone who believes."

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A Chinese man fails a math test

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Bob: Do you know the difference between beer and women? John: No Bob: Oh

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q. Why couldn't Billy see the pirate movie? A. Because his mom didn't let him.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

if you fall, I'll be there. -floor

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Reading re-posts of classic anti jokes posted by lonely teenagers.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because the Nazis were on the brink of losing the war and Berlin was shortly to be captured by Soviet forces.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? not finding a worm in your apple, i quite like them actualy

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

When the world ends what would be the death toll It would be unknown since every one would be around to calculate it

thumb_up thumb_down +11

An optimistic person says the glass is half full Pessimistic people say the glass is half empty Engineers say the glass is 2 times the size it needs to be.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a calculator without a brain? A calculator.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did dallin fall off the swing he got hit by jds big penis

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's worse that tripping over on your way home from work? Finding your entire family murdered

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Whats worse than the Holocaust? Anal

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did one dead baby say to another dead baby? Nothing... they were dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How much does a polar bear weigh? Depends on the polar bear and its dietary habits

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A man walks in to a bar, and the Bartender says "Why the long face?" The man replies "My wife is dying of Terminal Cancer".

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops