what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

A: Doctor doctor help me! B: Sorry, I'm not actually a doctor, stop calling me that!

If a man dies in China, Does anybody care?

Why did Timmy mow the lawn? He didn't particularly like the way it looked Why did Timmy fall down the well? He is retarded and thirsty How did Timmy die? He had stage three lung cancer Why cant Timmy drive a car? He has been dead for three years

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

whats a parkour kid? someone who jumps off things and is a pre-teen with adhd

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs going down a mountain? A: As good as dead.

Roses are red Violets are blue Not all poems rhyme Penis

What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust No, the Holocaust never even happened, you're an idiot.

A Blonde, Brunnette, and red head are on the beach. They find a sand gene and are each granted a wish. The Brunnette wishes for a yot. The Red Head wishes to never again get sun burn. The Blonde wishes for more sun. The world is overtaken and insinerated by the sun. An alien spaceship finds the Red head in a space suit floating around randomly when they ask how she survived she says "I don't sun burn"

What do black people and asians have in common? arms

Your momma so stupid that it's really inspiring she managed to overcome her limitations and raise such a wonderful family.

Roses are Red I shit in your Stew When you eat it The joke is on you

What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

theres a taco and a blonde...who eats who? the blonde eats the taco.

Knock Knock Who's There Lettuce Lettuce who? Lettuce down the street building his new garage

A man walks into a bar He orders a beer, drinks the beer, then leaves.

How does it change many dyslexics to take a lightbulb

Get a life besides thumbing down statements telling you advice.........

Why couldn't the black man get out of jail? He couldn't post his bond.

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

Why was the clock off? Because it was broken

Theaters say silence is golden... Trap silence in a jar, make millions.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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