What do call the time things don't go the way you plan them? Reality. bitch

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Why is it unpleasant to eat a meal with lots of basketball players? Because they will be focussing entirely on discussing tactics (especially if there is an upcoming game), and therefore will probably not be displaying good manners or making polite mealtime conversation.

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Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? He was dead.

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A drunk man into a bar. He is ripping apart a family

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sky silverstein

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. To get to the other side.

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How many electricians does it take to screw on a light bulb? 1

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Guy gets new car. TRANFORMER!

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An overweight person falls down the stairs.. They had to be taken to A&E as they suffered very serious injuries.

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chuck norris was shot yesterday... tomorrow is the bullets funeral.

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What did the woman say to her abusive husband? You're hurting me.

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"It smells like up dog in here." "What's up dog?" "Not much, what's up with you?"

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why did everyone laugh at the kid in the wheel chair as he entered the room? he was poor

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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knock knock who's there? the paperboy the paperboy who? i lied, i'm a serial rapist, you should have looked through the peephole

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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A Jew ran into a wall with a boner. He broke his nose first.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar

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Q: What's the best part of having sex with twenty-seven year olds? A: By age twenty-seven the average person has reached sexual maturity, and has also developed mentaly enough to understand, and subsequently process the intimate nature of an adult relationship.

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Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

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Who always participates in "No shave November"? The homeless.

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Doctor: “Knock Knock” Patient: “Who's there?” Doctor: “The interrupting Doctor” Patient: “The inter- Doctor: You have cancer.

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Do you know what the worst part about inbreeding is? - It's runs in the family!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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