Why did the... Timmy, your mother and I are both tired.

What did the clown say when he was denied health insurance? Nothing, he died of his pre-existing heart condition.

Why didn't the woman have a penis? Because she was female.

The good part of "Age" of Ultron? THANOS REIGNS! Disagree? Just leave the green thumb and fuck off!

your momma is so poor that she is on welfare.

What do you call a half-Latino, half-Asian baby? The product of a healthy interracial couple.

womens rights

What's red, white, and black, and spins around and around? A penguin in a blender

Why is this website called anti-jokes? i don't know but it makes sense.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Before you sneeze Say PIK-Achoo

I insist, you go ahead. See you around. how about in four six hours?

XD, I know I noticed myself, I was like "why the fuck did I post that shit?" Rellez XD okay sistah, I think I am just gonna get some sleep now, but Nero, is not Justin Bibble the first one?

Nothing is as strong as love, Except a nuclear warhead that can destroy entire cities! :P thoko like :D ~~k0mradey``

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

why was sally the best at hid and go seek they couldn't find her body

Roses are red Violets are blue There's nothing else I want to say

What do you call a man with no arms? Richard, as that is his name.

How many Terry Pratchetts does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. They were walking and baby tomato starts lagging behind. So the papa tomato stomps on the baby tomato and says nothing because tomatoes can't talk.

What do you call it when a dead man has his wallet stolen? Rob Zombie.

Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

What`s that CREAM that comes out of you when your mom puts a WHIP on you with a switch? WHIP CREAM!

how many licks does it take to get to the center of lollipop? unknown.

Why couldn't the boy watch the DVD about pirates? Because his mother did not understand the importance of putting the disc back in it's case after use, and as a result, has become too damaged for the DVD Player to play.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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