You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

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Why did the Nazi Doctor drown a Jew in the lake? To see how long it would take a Jew to drown with its big nose. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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What do you call a black guy in a Walmart? A customer. You prejudice dullard!

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What's the most confusing day in the ghetto? Fathers day.

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Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

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I hate it when people dont finish there sen

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Have you seen the clown hiding from gay people at walmart?

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What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

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What's long, brown, and in the toilet? The chocolate bar I just threw in the toilet.

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why couldnt luke open the door? he had no arms

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A man is sleeping and is woken up. What does he say? Why did you wake me up

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot lost control of the plane.

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What did the cracker say to the cheese? You're so cheesy.

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Whats red, black and brown? My anus after a Friday night

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What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

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A paper cut is a tree's last revenge.

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Yo' momma is so old she should probably go to the doctor and check her health so she can live a longer, more healthy life.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. i have Alzheimer's, cheese on toast.

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An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It thought they were playing follow the leader. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? It had no arms. Why did the little girl fall off her tricycle? She was hit by three monkeys and a refrigerator.

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A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

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Kid A:We're home alone, you know what that means. Kid B:Cover ourselves in vaseline and slide around like slugs on the kitchen floor? Kid A:Yes

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Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

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when life gives you lemons, force a hobo to eat them because lemonade is going to suck if life doesnt give you any sugar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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