How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? Let's go play on our bikes.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Want to hear a joke? ...you're straight.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q:what do u call a dead baby tied to my feet? A:new shoes

thumb_up thumb_down -1

hey babe, are you made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium? because i like people made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the difference between 2 pieces of meat? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why? Why not?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what did the aboriginal kid get for christmas? your bike.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

knock knock, who's there me me who he opens the door a kills yo

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what do u call a black guy who sells drugs a pharmacist

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the difference between Neal Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neal Armstrong was the first man to WALK on the MOON, while Michael Jackson enjoyed touching young boys.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

thumb_up thumb_down -1

I was going to write a joke about procrastination, but I haven't gotten to it yet.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what did the history teacher say to his class? Get your books out.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -1

If pro is the opposite of con what's the opposite of progress? Retrogression.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Look down at your keyboard. Notice that U and I are together? <3 Also notice that J and K are together too!:P

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in a circle.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what did the duck say to the monkey.............. QUACK!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: What has four eyes but can't see? A: A blind guy with glasses

thumb_up thumb_down -1

(Knock knock) A:who is it? B:its the police open up where coming in B:I SAID OPEN THE BLOODY DOOR A:(SHIT)

thumb_up thumb_down -1

If little jimmy has five candy bars and he eats three, what does little jimmy have? Diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They beat her mercilessly.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

If John has 10 packs of beer and he drinks 8 packs,what is John left with? Morbid Obesity.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops