How do you turn a piece of meat into a vegetable Break her neck

What do a Siamese cat and a birch tree have in common? Both exist.

Q. What is a deaf man's favorite song? A. Nothing, because he can not hear.

You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

Why did the chicken Cross the road? Because a Blackman was chasing his dinner

that moment when the last few ceral are like "Come on catch me bitch"

Friends are like trees. They fall when hit multiple times with an axe.

Why were people laughing when Muhammad Ali signed autographs for his fans? He was making jokes regarding his Parkinson's syndrome in order to elevate an otherwise melancholy experience for the audience.

But there's a sound Dumbledore knows... What does the Fawkes say?

why was 6 afraid of 7? because he raped her

Blonde: what does IDK stand for? Brunette: it stands for I Don't Know Blonde: okay, I get it now

How do you get a person to jump off a cliff? You push them.

Why was the Jimmy Sad? Because he had Autism.

Why did Sally cross the road? Because a rapist was chasing her

Q:What did the homeless guy say to the business man on the cell phone A: Nothing because he doesn't want to disturb his phone call

How do you turn that frown upside down? You move many muscles in your face.

A barman walks into a bar. He works there.

Knock knock, Whos there? Your adopted.

Why Do cats purr when you pet them? I'm actually asking a question there I don't know why.

What is brown and smells bad? A white person that had been bathed in brown paint, and didn't shower for the next month, and rubbed poop all over them, and rubbed diarrhea all over them and rubbed rock poop all over them and rubbed pee all over them, and rubbed mud all over them, and pooped in a bottle.

What do you call a black man who is flying a plane? A pilot.

Did you hear the one about the dead guy? Apparently he was no longer living.

A guy walked into a bar a hundred years ago and but a pint of whiskey. He is dead now.?

You killed my brother and call me the antichrist? Its lovable: Jesus said on the cross, I shall return. Then he returned three days later to say goodbye to his people. Moral: What the **** are you Åsshats waiting for? The third coming? He died for their sins, not for yours... WELCOME TO HELL!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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