Q: what did the old man do to the little boy in his dark cellar while babysitting on a stormy night? A: told him to hold a flashlight because the power went out and he needed to find his electric generator.

Why do deer have horns? Because god made them that way.

The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

Roses are red Violets are purple, and anyone who tells you otherwise is wrong.

What does greg and Ian have in common?

Whats worse than forgetting your first homework assignment of the new school year? Being hazed on the first day of school to the point where you seriously consider suicide

Who pushed joe off the building? Nobody. joe hated his life and wanted to die

Looking's for free... Touching's for free.

Why did the monkey cross the road? Because he saw the chicken do it.

what's the only thing funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? The look on the mom's face.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a gun, get in the van.

What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer.

What is funnier then 25 9/11

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I want to get you pregnant.

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies on fire and a pile of living babies on fire? The dead babies are usually not as loud.

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

How did Allen Iverson compose one of the most well known interviews of all time? Practice.

What did the alcoholic tell his son? Don't do meth.

How did the old man die? He was shot after eating a rather large watermelon while skydiving out of a helicopter, boob fighting 5 toddlers.

What is the difference between a trampoline and a baby? You take your boots of before jumping on the trampoline!!!!!!!!!

What do you call an Asian guy doing homework? A student

What do you call a mexican man with a rubber toe? Ruberto.

Why was the protester on the floor? Because the protest had become a riot, and police brutality is a serious issue.

Can Anti-Jokes censor curse-word tenses? Fuck Fucking Fucked Fucks

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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