Why did the serial killer need the knife? He needed to butter his bread

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What's blue, orange, and silver all over? Nothing. That's a ridiculous combination of colors.

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If life's a box of chocolates, I'm the dominant male.

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What's the difference between a cult leader and a television personality? On average, 3.2 inches.

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A black man, a white man, and an Asian man walk into a bar. The black man says, "My wife died in a terrible book-keeping accident.". The white man says, "My wife died in a terrible lightbulb-sorting accident.". The Asian says, "My wife died in a terrible geography accident.". Soon after, the bar was hit by a missile, promptly killing the three men.

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How many pancakes can you fit into a gopher hole? Red - because ice cream doesn't have any bones.

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What do you call a blonde doctor? Doctor

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DON'T TOUCH MY DUCK, IT HAS A ONE DOLLAR BILL

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Roses are red Violets are blue I shit my pants do you want my poo.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

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Nero, I mean it, I want you and your wife to have 15 million dollars, it wont buy you the happiness you seek, but it helps no?

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Roses are Red I shit in your Stew When you eat it The joke is on you

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Q: How did Mary get frostbite A: Her mother locked her in a freezer

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Why didnt the cannibal like the taste of the comedian? because the comedian smelled very bad and the cannibal forgot to add salt.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Today I'll wear a hat on my head Instead of a shoe.

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What happened to Grant when he did a cart wheel? Chuck had sex with Victoria

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What did the blind man say to his teacher? Nothing, blind people can't talk.

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Q.what semtemce is a most used lie by a fourteen year old? A. Yes i agree to the terms of service, and am above the age eighteen.

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Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have amnesia, i'm Skepta

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Me

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What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

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How many infants does it take to paint a house? Forty-Seven.

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Q. What did the barber say to the Italian kid? A. Do you want your hair cut or should I just change the oil.?

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Roses are red, and many other colors too.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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