'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

whats worse than having ice cream and not eating it? Being lactose intolerant

Why was the boy sad? because the serotonin level in his brain was significantly lower than normal.

All of these jokes are about white people

you will like this because i am black.

Why did whitney Houston become a drug addict? Because she made some very bad decisions in her life.

how hungry am i? well im as hungry a starving kid in africa!!!!

Why did the chicken cross the road? His mother was a prostitute.

What's the best thing about having sex with twenty six year olds? There's twenty of them.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had bullied 6 and his old pal 21 back in his younger days.

What's the difference between a statue and a real human? The statue can't run if the birds shit on it.

Roses are black. Violets are black. Black people are black, And you're a douche.

How did the frog fly? It drank a magic potion. How did the snake fly? It ate the frog How the the eagle fly? It already can.

A man walks outside and sits down to eat his sandwich.

Whats the difference between a Ferrari and an erection? I dont have a Ferrari!!

Knock knock whos there? Jake jake who? jake from state farm, and i'd like to tell you about our insurance company

Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

What make's a constuction worker drop's his hammer? MC Hammer moves.

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

What is black, white, and red all over? Rape.

How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Mice don't have the strength required to do that.

Hey! Have you ever heard of the Alzheimers joke?

Q. why did the boy who just had his first kiss feel no emotion? A. He got hit a Croquet mallet and died

How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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