What does Pluto and a creamsicle have in common? Neither of them are a planet.

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"Knock Knock" "Come in"

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Why did the man drop one dozen long stem roses? Because he was hit by a taxi cab

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What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out the chamber.

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What do u do when u hear about a smart Blonde. Cant think of anything? Exactly

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What did the boy eat for breakfast? Food

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What did the mother say to her son? I have Leukemia.

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Ernie: "Hey Jim, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Jim then breaks down and cries deeply at Ernie's question as the fact that he was born without a tongue continues to slowly tear him apart.

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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Whats funnier than a massacre? Everything.

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A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

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Q: Why did the boy fall off his bicycle? A: Because someone threw a fridge at him.

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Hey Johnny what's after 2?? 3.

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How did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. On its way there, he got hit by a bus.

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I literally died laughing

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jim davidson , nick griffin , and bernard manning walk into a bar , and order a bitter, a lager, and a stout respectfully

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What time is it? If I hadn't poked your eyes out, you might know.

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Why do they call Jean a redneck? Because her neck was red from being in the sun for so long.

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Whats the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I take off my shoes to step on trampolines.

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A man drove up to a drive-thru. He ordered a coke, but the lady at the window spilled it on his lap. He promptly changed his clothes and accepted the lady's apology.

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why did the chicken cross the rode? so it can get the seed that is between the two yellow lines, and then he walked back without getting hit by a car.

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you will like this because i am black.

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Josh Groban, John Mayer, Ben Folds and Nick Cave are at an underground club that specialises in lithuanian folk music and siberian vodka. end of story

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whats worse than having ice cream and not eating it? Being lactose intolerant

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops