What is small, red all over and gets shorter by the second? A baby cutting its hair with a potato peeler

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Yo mamma so stupid... She's considering going to college to get a better education

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a man rides on his horse to rohde island and back. he rode on Friday and returned on Friday. damn, that's one fat horse

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What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to commit suicide through vehicular manslaughter and knew that the average human being would not be able to stop before it was too late.

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all these jokes are horrible now

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Cole likes to trim jaycie's butt pubes

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why did the jockey lose the horse race? he mistook his horse for Sara Jessica Parker

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What's Hitler's favorite drink? Jews (meaning juice)

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Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

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Who is yellow and cant drive straight. A man dying of lukemia

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the man stop playing his computer game? The SWAT busted down his door and quickly pinned him down and arrested him for the murder of 7 families, he was charged for life in prison.

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How many fairies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two, but I don't know how they got in there.

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What happened when Susie fell off the Ferris Wheel? There was an open seat.

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A pregnant woman walks into a bar and miscarries.

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Roofs are Red...I have a Cunt!!!

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Why did Jimmy's mom cry? She got stabbed in the arm and was suffering while bleeding to death.

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Why was the Mexican sleeping? He wishes to decrease his risk of motor vehicle accidents.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

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I saw a shooting star. It shot me.

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Why did the blonde fail her science test? Because she spent all day at the hair salon getting her hair died from brown to blonde when she should have spent the time productively studying.

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What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my basement.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops