Person 1: Ask me if I'm a tree. Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No.

Q: Why did the Asian fail his driving test? A: Lack of concentration on the road and low knowledge of functioning a car.

How did OJ get away with murder? No one really knows. Probably because he an excellent group of lawyers

Two egyptian soccerclubs are playing, what's the score? Over 70 dead

What would you call a two-foot Irishman named Max? Max.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Scott Scott who? Scott Henderson. Oh my god Scotty! I haven't seen you since highschool, please come in.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your penis.

Why was Jacob not allowed to play sports? He fell down in the middle off the street and got ran over 50 times and could never do anything again.

Damn, I was gonna do my laundry but Amanda Todd drank all my bleach

Women.

A wise man once told me that friends are like cookies. He was a cannibal.

School is like a boner. It is long and hard unless your asian.

What do you call a cow who can't produce milk? Utter failure.

What's black and blue and hates sex? The unfortunate child in a pedophile's basement who the police have yet to find.

What is the difference between a Ferrari and a bag of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

What do you call a bathtub full of dead babies? A tragedy.

What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

What did the man say to his wife. Hi

Ask me if I care. Do you care? No.

why does Tom Sawyer like apples? He likes their flavor

roses are red voilets are red bushes are red trees are red HOLY SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE!!!!!!

Wuy are Kenyans so fast? Because due to variations in evolution, people from that part of the world have a better muscle build to run at higher speeds than equally trained athletes from other parts of the world.

What does Michael have in common with NASA? Not a lot.

Why was the ghast from minecraft crying? His family died

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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