Knock knock! Who's there? Girl Scouts selling cookies! I'm not legally allowed within 500 yards of you. Please get off my property.

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What's worst than a worm in your apple? Finding your mom in a porno.

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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What happened to the man who grew into the couch? He was surgically removed and forced to exercise daily. He is feeling much better now.

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Why did the chiken cross the road? idk, i can't talk to chikens

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what do you call a Nice Nazi A Nazi... He's still a Nazi.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because it broke...

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How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

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What does a penguin and a watermelon have in common? They all come from Earth.

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. The fight began and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing you say when you don't want to fight anymore and you let the other person win?" The other guy says to the challanger, "I give up?" Then the challenger yells. "I WIN!"

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What's a vampire's favorite dessert? Vampire's don't exist What's Helen Keller's favorite dessert? Helen Keller doesn't exist

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man......they apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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why did the baby fall down the stairs? i pushed it.

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What do you call a lesbian with a penis? Justin Bieber.

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Knock knock, who's there? Your mom! Oh I'm comming.

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hey guess what? what ur gay! how did you know ive been in the closet for 5 years!?

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? He died. Why did the raccoon fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the bear.

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Who looks like Justin bieber, and is really cool? Justin Bieber, but I lied about him being cool.

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Whats the worst thing about dying? Your not alive anymore.

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Whats fast, dead and make of CGI. Paul Walker

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what did the potato say to the apple nothing food can't talk

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why was the little boy sad he found out he had breast cancer

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How do you cut the sea in half? You can't. There are an odd amount of letters. You would have to jeopardize the "e", but then it would no longer be "sea".

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What's the best part about the school burning down? All the children trapped inside never had to grow up

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops