What did Santa say when he came to drop off your toys? Nothing. Santa doesn't exist.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

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Knock knock Who's there Orange Orange who Orange

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So God answered a paralyzed boy's prayer the other day...He said 'No'

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You know whats funny? Women's rights

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what did the McDonald's cashier say to the fat man ordering a large chocolate milkshake? you want some fries with that shake?

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What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

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1500 Jews were ordered to walk a straight path whilst in the midst of a blizzard. How close did they ever get to the end? What end? They marched until every last bit of their rotten Jew flesh was driven from their weak bodies. --Amon Goeth

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SPILL THE BEAAAANNSSSS

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What's awesome about going to a no-pants party? Getting stabbed 2 times.

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Why did the old lady walk across the road? She was on her way to the convenience store on the other side.

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A Rabi, a priest, and a monk all go to different churches because they all have different beliefs an respect each others decisions.

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what is black and looks like a rasberry a blackberry

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daisy's are white, Metallica.

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What happened when the man turned on his TV? It was tuned to the Discovery Channel

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What is wrong with being a black Jew? You have to sit in the back of the oven.

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roses are red, violets are blue, if ruddell was black, he would smell of poo.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting cow wh- SHUT UP!

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a suicidal man walks up 49 floors and enters a room and opens the window. hes worked there for 5 years and the air condition is broken

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So, a man walks into a bar. His alcoholic habits are slowly tearing apart his marriage.

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Why did Abraham Lincoln fall asleep at the movie? He was shot several times in the back of the head.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poems, Show me your tits.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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