Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Jimmy -thatcooltyguy

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What would you do if I jumped down your throat when you were talking? That would never happen, as it's impossible to even climb into somebody's mouth.

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What did the cat say to the dog before chasing each other You have a nice looking ass

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A man walks into his room with a DVD and a box of kleenex. The DVD is a wedding video of his now dead wife.

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Q: How did the robber steal a laptop from best buy? A: With his hands

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Roses are red Violets are red Grass is red OMFG MY LAWN IS ON FIRE !!!?

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Roses are red, violets are blue, some people are gay, and so are you

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Why did the turtle take so long on his run? Because he never went on a run he walked.

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What do you do if a goose comes flying towards you? Duck.

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How do you get a Jew to jump off a cliff? You kidnap his family and threaten to kill them if he doesn’t.

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This is a haiku. Not a very good haiku, But still a haiku.

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Why did the black girls wear fancy clothes to the mall? Public nudity is considered a crime in many parts of the world. It would be advisable to wear clothes in public areas, so as to avoid being arrested.

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What do you call a half-Latino, half-Asian baby? The product of a healthy interracial couple.

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How do you know you're crazy? Consult the pink pheasent to your left

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Why did Timmy masticate in front of everyone at the dinner table? If he hadn't, he would have choked on large chunks of food.

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What do you call a blue bucket? A blue bucket. What do you call a red bucket? A blue bucket in disguise.

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What's redder than a red apple? 2 red apples

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

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What do you call a horse with bread on its ears? Boris, because that's his name.

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Why did the black man drop his weed Because he got shot

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall, He cracked his skull and died on impact. He will be missed.

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What do you call a school bus full of black people? A school bus

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Why are the deserts so dry? Obama

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She loves me, she dosn't love me, she loves me, the girl walks up to the man and says, she doesn't love me

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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