a man walked into a bar.the bar was metal and he cracked his skull

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How does Moses like his tea? Hebrews it.

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Ask me if I'm a cucumber. Are you a cucumber? No.

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Why wasn't the woman happy when she gave birth? Because she was thrown into a pool of semen 9 months ago.

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What's the worst part about rollerblading? Telling your dad that you're gay.

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But who would want to sell us out and why?

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Why does a squirrel have the tail at the back? Because at the front it's the squirrel.

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A blind man walks into a bar. Another man asks him if hes ever seen the new movie that came out. he then replies, "i heard it" then curled up into a ball and cries for several hours.

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What did the chicken say to the duck .... Nothing the chickin was Spanish and the duck was illiterate

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what do u call a joke with no punchline? A joke with no punchline

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

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man: im hungry can i have a sandwich wife: go make one man: then what are you gonna do

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What's worse then mud on your shoes. Being assassinated by means of a dart to the throat.

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Chris Brown walks into a bar. And then is politely asked to leave as the bar owner also happens to be the spokesperson for an anti-domestic violence group.

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-Knock Knock - no one respond , they were brutally murdered by a drug addict.

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If your fighting an octopus on mars how many lamps does it take to repair a dog house? Nine because a toaster cannot ride a bicycle.

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What's better than 24-year-olds? Twenty 4-year-olds.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know... I thought no one knew the answer to that question...

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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A baby is cold and won't drink it's milk It's dead

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my ilkshake brings all the boys in the yard. and the local health inspector's like , have you got a permit to be selling dairy beverages from a home based business?

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Why did the girl eat a sandwich? because she was thirsty

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what's blue and looks like a shirt? a blue shirt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops