ROSE ARE BROWN VIOLETS ARE BROWN WHO SH*IT IN MY GARDEN!!!!!

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Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: "There goes my income. I dont know how I'll support my family now, or keep my crops alive."

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What do you call a guy with aids? Your dad

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What do call a man with a daranged wife? Married

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What's funny about a small child with no arms, no legs? Nothing.. Nothing at all.

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Why didn't Megan do her homework? Although Megan was an intelligent girl who had always done well academically, she remained unconvinced that anything taught in school held practical or philosophical importance.

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No, but I am not just an author, the important thing is, that this kid has been stopped as we speak, as I said he was selling information to several clients on the deep web, and patterns do reveal that he was selling you out piece by piece while prepared to make a run for it once he delivered the vital details. Say, did you promote this guy a bit too fast or something? Either he knows as much as you do, or otherwise he has been learning the ins and outs of your little place pretty fast.

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A man walks out of a bar. Gets in his car and crashes because drunk driving isn't safe.

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I have read and agreed to the terms of service

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How do you kill a blond? Stab her repeatedly in her throat

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what did god say when we made his first nigga oops i acidenlty burnt it

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What did Johnny get for Christmas? Nothing. Johnny is Jewish.

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Why did the girl drop out of school? She was being sexually assaulted by her mothers alcoholic boyfriend and was having trouble coping.

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Q. Why did the child's mother tell him to clean his room? A. Because his room was messy.

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How do you describe a cranky rapist? Cranky and rapist

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Why does Larry the Cable Guy get his own T.V. show??? Why can't I have one of my own??? .......ah...forgot....I'm a minority...

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Your mother is so fat because she inherited poor genes and dietary habits from her own parents.

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Q: A giraffe fell in a hole and died. Which was taller the Lion or Giraffe? A: The Giraffe was before it died

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Jimmy: Knock, knock, Grandmother: Who's there? Jimmy: Jimmy Grandmother: Jimmy who? And then Jimmy held back tears as he knew grandmother's Alzheimer's disease was getting worse.

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Who's mean and white and really not nice? Hitler

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Q. Whats red and smells like blue paint? A. Wheres my tractor?

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Q:What's the difference ethernet a corvette and a pile of dead baby's? A:I don't have a corvette in my garage

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face" and the horse says "my wife just died of skin cancer."

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Knock Knock Who's there? re-posession officers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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