How does a cow does a cow do an evil laugh?

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Chuck Norris once jumped off of a 9 story building. He broke half of the bones in his body because he is 71 years old.

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why is there art classes so people can make beautiful pieces of art :)

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What do you get when you cross a black man and an octopus? I don't know, but it sure would pick a lot of cotton.

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Q: How many Jews are there in Germany? A: None, they all died in the holocaust

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roses are red violets are blue if you and your sister were hanging from a cliff i'd save your sister

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How many squirrels does it take to screw out a light bulb? None because squirrels lack the strength and mind set to screw out a light bulb.

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Charlie Sheen

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What's worse than seeing your grandfather dead on the floor? Seeing your grandmother standing over him with a knife

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2 wales are at the bar one looks at the other and dose a wale call for 5 long minutes and the other one reply's "dude your drunk we got to go"

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What did the woman say to her abusive husband? You're hurting me.

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Q:Where did sally go when the bomb went off? A: Everywhere.

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why did the boat sink the captain drove it into a pile of sharp rocks

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why dont black people celebrate thanksgiving? kfc is closed on holidays

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How many members of Coldplay can you fit in a mini? 4, as there are 4 members of Coldplay.

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Why do elephant tusks stick out? For uprooting trees and bushes, and for defending their young.

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what did the woman say? 'duhhh, i don't have a penis durr durr' (By the way, I'm trying to be not misogynistic, please let me know if you find this misogynistic in any way)

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there are three girls one said daddy why is my name rose because a rose fell on her head when yur a baby. daddy why is my name feather because a feather fell on your head when your a baby mumamhama, SHUT UP CINDER BLOCK!

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A Priest a Rabbi and a duck walk into a bar. The rest of the patrons continue to drink until the situation seems less strange.

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You can't choose your family, so choose someone else's.

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A man buys some expensive lingerie for his wife on the occasion of their 10th wedding anniversary. After a lovely candlelight dinner at home, he tells her to close her eyes at which point he retrieves the gift box containing her anniversary present. Thoroughly exited, she rips open the box and takes out the beautiful garment, holding it up to the light in wide-eyed amazement. Her husband gives her a suggestive wink and says "would you like to join me in the bedroom to try it on?" To which she replies, "I AIN'T YER WHORE!"

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, your parents are dead they never loved you! I found this one on facebook and i just found this site and all yall got some good jokes LOL

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What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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