Why couldn't the woman drive? She was dead.

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A horse enters a bar. The bartender looks at the horse and says "Why the harness?"

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''Hey, this is absolutely true. There's an organization now called 'Draft Dick Cheney for President, 2012.' Yeah. Good luck with that. They tried to draft Dick Cheney five times during Vietnam. That didn't work.

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Knock, knock. MAN: Who's there? ... MAN: Hello? Anyone out there? ... MAN: Must be the wind.

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How did Debbie get a black eye? Because her dad asked her to take off her pants and she refused so he beat her

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Why did the man eat his own shoe? Because it was a tissue box.

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Is it a ironic if a man with ADD is driving a Ford Focus?

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friends are like snowflakes. if you piss on them they go away

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What did the little girl say to her mother? Nothing, the previous day the little girl was kidnapped and rapped by two 40 year old men and was eventually decapitated...she will never speak to her mother again.

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A door walks up with a knob what does the guy do? he opens the door

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You arrive in the middle east. What is the first thing that you want to do? Leave

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The president is invited to a party at Bill's house. Suddenly the house catches on fire. Who survived? No one, they all died.

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Q. Whats the worst soccer team in the world. A. Ass-enal.

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What do you call a zebra eating Cheerios? A zebra eating Cheerios.

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why do jews like money? So they can support their family.

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why is the black guy cross the rode. he did not' he got in a truck. i know it does not make s...

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what do you call a jew hanging from a tree? dead

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Q: Human being? A: False. Jew.

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She likes her sex like she likes her penises. Without a woman.

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the car get in the car

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Bob has 80 chocolate bars, he gives 5 to his uncle,10 to his mother and 8 to his freind. He then eats 40 chocolate bars. Q. How many chocolate bars has bob got left now? A. Bob has no chocolate bars left. Shortly after Bob ate 40 bars he was diagnosed with diabetes. He then died of a heart attack due to high cholesterol.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Watch me shoot you

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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