What did the fridge say to the watermelon? Nothing.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Parkinsons, ;oshgfs;jgbRHG

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A mexican, Japanese, and American man are eating lunch one day at work by the window. The Mexican says, "Wow! If I get a taco one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The Japanese man says, "Wow! If I get a bowl or ramen one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The American says" If I get grilled cheese one more time, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The next day, the mexican jumped off because he got a taco. Then, the japanese man jumped off for getting ramen. Then, the American jumped off for getting a grilled cheese sandwhich. At the funeral, the mexican wife said, "Oh if i knew he was gonna jump, I would'nt have packed it." The japanese wife said, "If I knew he was gonna jump, I wouldn't have packed it either." The American wife didn't say anything because she was hit by a bus.

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Once upon a time in a far away kingdom, people lived in it. The End.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" Turns out a man suffering from schizophrenia believes he is a bartender for animals as his health slowly declines as his family comes to visit him every day.

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What is worse than the holocaust. A worm in MY apple!

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why do the klu kux klan wear pillowcases on their heads? they were going to go with coon skin but thought it was a little much!!

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what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

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What do you call a cross between a dog and a bumblebee? One messed up lab experiment!

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Sonny Bono walked into a bar. No, wait, he crashed into a tree.

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A man is boarding a plane. The attendant asks if he has a passport. The man says no, and leaves.

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What's worse than being eaten by a giant bear? Hitler.

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Why cant Sally ride her bike? Because she has ceribal pausly

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How do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot.

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A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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Once upon a time, there was a cat. He died.

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3 men walk into a bar, and the fourth guy behind them had the sense to duck under it.

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Why do we oftenly see african cry for nothing? Because this is the only way they get water.

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why did the homeless man die? because everyone does.

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Theres a blonde and a brunette at a party. The redhead is left out because she has no soul.

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the awkward moment when a fat person says they are fat

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Justin's life

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whats funnier than a banana an orange -may bieber

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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