If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Deteriorate

What do you call a magic owl? HOO-DINI!

Q) How many boring people does it take to screw in a light bulb? A) One

theres a straight guy, a gay guy ,and a jew the weird part is the straight guy hits on the jew and the gay guy which make the situation all akward.

Person: Hello Parking Meter! Parking Meter: Hello! The person then backed away in fear

How do you piss of camon? Have sex with shelby!

What's the difference between a black cat and a black cat? Nothing.

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Dinosaurs are extinct.

if you're jesus and you know it, clap your hands

I was watching Fox news.

BIG PENIS

Q: What did the giraffe say to the sunflower? A: I like your shoelaces!

Why didn't Avery die when he got hit by a bus? The bus was going three miles per hour.

Title IX

A thief walks into a bank. He has an account there and withdraws 200 bucks.

11/9 Americans won't get this joke.

CUT MY SOUL INTO PIECES MY NAME IS VOLDEMORT TERMINATION YOU'RE BLEEDING DON'T GIVE A F**K IF I HAVE NO NOSE FOR BREATHING

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Sandwich.

Why wasn't the white guy voted for president? He had down syndrome

What is the difference between a Jew and pizza? Pizza does not scream when it goes in the oven.

So a plane flies into a world trade centre... That's not funny

Why did Susan fall off the swing? -Because she has no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Susan.

ASUS Live Update has stopped working.

Dennis: you can make anything out of coppersulfate Austin: But copper sulfate can make things out of you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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