Did you hear about the human cannonball who lost his job? Circus attendance is on the decline, as people are spending less money on entertainment, due to a slow economy and poor consumer confidence. Because the circus owners paid him under the table, he did not qualify for unemployment and was force to take a job at Hardies. He has a drinking problem and suffers from depression.

cake cake and no cake, your life just ended

How many different ways can you kill a cat? 27, unless you live in Russia then it's 28

What is BIG, STIFF, AND FULL OF SEMEN!!!? A SUBMARINE!!!!!!!

How do you get Pikachu on a Bus? Pikachu Is A Fictional Charecter.

What's worser than dieing? Living-being tortured while at it too

What did Ghandi tell St Peter as he passed through the Gates of Heaven? He didn't. There is no afterlife.

Two lions are walking down the street. One lion says to the other, "where is everybody?"

Yo mamma so poor she got a job.

Q: Why was it bad to be a black jew during the Holocaust? A: You had to sit at the back of the gas chamber

what did one toilet say to the other toilet? i would love to flush u

How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The woodchuck's ability to chuck has been left indeterminable. Therefore until the wood chuck's prowess in wood chucking is brought to light we must leave it a variable. Using the coefficient (L) to represent wood that can possibly be chucked. Then using (C) to represent the life cycle of said wood chuck chucking. We are also assuming this woodchuck will remain vigilante and not require food or sleep for the entire duration of chucking ultimately lowering is maximum chucking output. From this we can determine the W.C.P.S. (wood chucks per second). Finally subtract the remaining wood (RW) from the chucked total and we have rendered that : L(W.C.P.S) - (C -RM/t) = X

Q: Why is asprin white? A: It works.

A man walks into a bar. Suddenly, he is filled with a strange feeling, as if his life is somehow the subject of a stupid joke. He walks back out of the bar and consults a psychiatrist.

A horse trots into a bar. He is left with a bump on his head.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Some wild chickens have regular seasonal migration patterns that might require them to cross a road while traveling south. Wild chicken movements include those made in response to changes in food availability, habitat or weather.

Nobody cares maddie!

What do Miley and Billy Ray Cyrus have in common? Half their DNA

why did the blind kid cross the road... because he was sick of being blind

Advertiser: Charlies Tax---------- Advertiser: OMG, who are you... Pedobear: Hello kids, come in my taxi(Van) :D

Well, you see, I'm an extractor fan.

Why don’t stores sell mouse-flavored cat food? It’s a matter of marketing; tuna, chicken and liver flavors sound much more palatable to the humans buying the pet food.

My dad is lactose intolerant. He shouldn't eat cheese.

Why did the black man buy a watermelon? To give to his wife to cut up for his family to have at a picnic

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...