A duck walks into a bar and buys a drink. When the bartender comes up he says put it on my bill

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Three guys went hunting on a rainy day. The first guy slipped.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

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yo mama just like a toilet, white and full of crap!

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What's worse than the holocaust? Microwaveable jellied horse nipple

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Knock Knock Jehovah's witnesses!

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Roses are red Violets are blue What about pansies

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No antijoke here.

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If Tigger was a black panther Christopher Robin would have named him Nigger.

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why did kim kardashian get divorced? because she was unhappy with her marrige. and because shes a slut

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Actually, Ylvis had a dog named Say. When he peed in the studio one evening, Ylvis said, "What the fuck, Say?"

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What is white and weighs twice as much as Shamoo? My ass.

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A wife says to her husband "Everybody's coming over tonight, I want you to dress nice." *logically this cannot happen because there is no way that this couples residence can fit all 6 or so billion people in the world, nor would they want to.

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What did the duck say to the pickle? Quack

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Knock Know! Come in!

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the game

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Why dose my mom have a penis? She is a man

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Twelve men walk into a bar, and get stuck in the door because it's far too small for all of them to walk through at the same time.

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When you wish upon a star... You are only seeing the light of that star, which has taken billions of years to travel here. The star that you are looking at has most likely dead, Just like your dreams.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimer's Cheese and toast

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into another apple and finding the other half

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How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died

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What's Donald Trump's favorite color? Green.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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