Hey are you sleepy? Good, cause I just saw Jeff The Killer and Slenderman outside your window. Good night!

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Why did the Asian ace the test? Because she had worked very diligently, taken copious notses, and studied fervently until she had a thorough mastery of the topic.

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the firefighter says to the other firefighter: hey firefighter, are we going to fight a fire?

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The teacher asked her class "What is 42 + 17?" Several hands were flung into the air. "71!" said Billy excitedly. "No, I'm sorry that is incorrect." said the teacher. "67!" shouted Carl at the top of his lungs. "Incorrect!" said the teacher. Then little Johnny raised his hand. "The answer is 69" he said full of intellectual delight. "Very good." said the teacher.

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a man walked into a bar and said ow

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at him.

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This man was known to beat his wife alot, To the car door to open it for her...

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick

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who is really lanky? james cornish

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Why couldn't Jimmy eat his food? Because I threw a microwave at him

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Why did the man die after getting his picture taken The camera was a gun

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Q: What is the difference between a horny college girls and a horny high school girl? A: Usually, an age will seperate people in different grades. Also, what grade their in.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because that's where the oncologist's office is.

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Asian son: "I'm using a calculator for my math" Asian mother: "Why not you calculatnow!"

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knock knock. who's there? just open. just open who? you're really dumb aren't you

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A boy walks into a shop He buys some sweets.

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WHY ARE WOMEN SO HARD TO SLEEP WITH? Because the men are always hard while sleeping with them

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Adam Claypool is a fag. and his mother sweats my cum. Now that we got that out of the way lets get to the jokes.

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Why did the police officer shoot the man in the wheelchair? Says the police: "He was running"

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Your mother is so slutty that she seduced me while I was drunk. I'm so sorry.

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What is big, long, hot, and firm? An erection due to the arousal of a woman's sex appeal.

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This week only, 2 for 1 misdemeanor shop lifting arrest. How can I do it? Because I can.

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why did the man choke at the lunch table. Police there is a banana attacking me what should I do?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops